The Boy Who Quit Piano
I gave in and let him quit piano–even though he’d been taking lessons for almost six years. He was good at it too, but he was also a pre-teen wanting to start controlling his life choices. I understood that too. Years later, I realized that letting him quit was the best thing I could have done. Though it seemed like time lost, it was actually inspiration gained.
But, as is often the case, his life seemed to move backward before moving forward. Quitting piano was the unofficial kick-off of four rebellious years that played out in behavior, academic performance, and choice of friends. There was even a brush with the law. I was challenged as a parent more than I ever thought possible. However, some tough lessons and a much needed change of schools, ushered in a whole new season, the season of sports…
It started with football, where he played wide receiver, using those “piano hands” to catch pigskins instead. But my sadness turned to joy at a playoff game when he made a huge diving catch on third down and, as the commentator noted, “kept the drive alive.” The whole football experience changed him. It changed me too. Football brought new friends into his life and increased his self-esteem. And I developed a passion for a sport I always “hated.”
By his junior year, he also participated in track-and-field. It was a brilliant move, and it was his decision. In his new pursuit, he excelled and likely still holds the school record for high-jump. Meanwhile, he’d also grown in character, which led to winning the coach’s award his senior year.
Then came college. After less than a week of pursuing his intended major in physical therapy, he came home one day and muttered almost imperceptibly, “I don’t even like science. I don’t know why I’m doing this. I’m supposed to be in music.”
I was stunned. It had now been eight years since he took lessons. Soon, however, he started wandering back to the piano, where he would spend hours playing anything and everything. He expressed regret that he had quit, worrying he’d never catch up enough to be a music major. I assured him he had the ability to pick it back up again easily. And, though I’m not a pianist myself, I did know enough about music to suggest that if he learned basic chords, he could “fake” almost anything–and do so rather quickly. His eyes widened with excitement and possibility. Clearly, the “fake it ‘till you make it” approach appealed to him.
With a new found determination and discipline, Michael mastered the basic chords quickly and was playing everything from “Bohemian Rhapsody” to Beethoven. And he was also gaining the confidence to embrace his calling. In fact, he discovered he had a special gift for improvisation. In time, he would backtrack and learn to sight read as well. Virtually any time he was home…he was at the piano.
In a matter of months, he auditioned and was accepted as a music therapy major with a concentration in piano. After graduating, he branched out to music education, directing high school ensembles and heading up a school for the arts founded by a famous opera singer. He continues to be sought after for improvisational work, accompanying, arranging, and performing. He has recently composed music for his second musical and has just earned a graduate degree in music theory and composition.
Yes, I let him quit piano. Many thought I was wrong to do so. But I learned an important life lesson. If someone has a true calling, that calling will pursue him until he’s caught. Michael may have quit music, but Music didn’t quit him.
“The one who calls you is faithful, and He will do it” (1 Thessalonians 5:24).
Karen Ross
You made a wise decision, allowing music to draw him where he belongs when he was ready.Now that decision is bearing fruit. Congratulations on his MA!
My life exhibited the opposite. I didn’t have the musical talent & was allowed to quit. But I loved music, talent or no. Like a bad penny, I kept showing up for anything involving music. I was sure that musical genius would strike any time. I’m still waiting…
Lorraine
As always, thank you so much for taking the time to read and respond. I suspect you have more musical talent than you give yourself credit for…💕
Judie
I remember some of these years. Congrats to Michael on his MA.